
<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-30-capitalizing-on-kindness-a-lucrative-proposal-for-drive-throughs/7302860144_6db6c3d82b_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image post-thumb" title="Capitalizing on Kindness">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-30-capitalizing-on-kindness-a-lucrative-proposal-for-drive-throughs/7302860144_f23e8f8039_t.jpg" alt="Capitalizing on Kindness"/>
</a>

It has been over a decade since I went through a drive-through of any kind, but I have heard rumors of a strange phenomenon developing in the United States in which customers will randomly decide to pay for the order of the customer behind them. The colloquial verbal phrase for such random acts of kindness which cannot be easily returned is [paying it forward](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pay_it_forward).  The drive-through kindness only works, of course, if there are two windows at the drive-through – the first to place your order, and the second to pay – _and there is room for a car to have already passed the order window and still be behind another car at the pay window_. I assume that the person paying, if they are feeling generous, inquires as to the amount of the order in the car behind, and then elects to go ahead and pay for that order too. Then, when the next customer gets their order, they are told that it was anonymously gifted to them by the car that just drove away, leaving them unable to pay back the favor. I have heard of cases in which each driver continues passing the kindness backwards in the drive through line for several cars. My friends that tell me about this happening to them use phrases like, "It made my day!"

This phenomenon truly produces a win-win-win situation. The benefactor, for very little money, gets a the pleasant sensation of doing something nice for someone (research shows this to be [the only way to actually buy happiness](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsihkFWDt3Y)); the recipient is pleasantly surprised by a present from a stranger; and the restaurant or coffee chain gets all the money in the transactions and two customers that will subconsciously relate their pleasant emotions with the restaurant's brand, making return business more likely.

The key to the pay it forward phenomenon is the displaced reciprocity.

It's this third consequence that I would like to explore. It seems to me that it would be very much in the interest of a company's shareholders for the company to encourage this sort of giving among its customers, thus raising the general public perception of the brand. How might a company go about incentivize such behavior?

### What to do: Suggestion

The pay window could have a sign that reads "Have you done something nice today?" and shows the price of the order of the customer behind the current paying customer. I feel reasonably certain that this would drastically increase the likelihood of someone choosing to treat their fellow motorist.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-30-capitalizing-on-kindness-a-lucrative-proposal-for-drive-throughs/7302860144_6db6c3d82b_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Capitalizing on Kindness">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-30-capitalizing-on-kindness-a-lucrative-proposal-for-drive-throughs/7302860144_f23e8f8039.jpg" alt="Capitalizing on Kindness"/>
</a>

### What not to do: Tracking

If the drive-through franchise already had a way of tracking customer purchases, such as membership card that got swiped with every order, it would be tempting to keep track of how much money each person spent on strangers and maybe display it as well to the customer in front of them, like "The customer behind you has spent $24.50 on strangers this year." While on the surface this might seem like a good idea and an even stronger motivation for someone to spurge on a stranger (both to provide reciprocity and also to raise one's own giving stats), everything I've learned about psychology tells me that this scheme would extinguish the behavior rather than promote it. If you pay it forward a few times, you will start to expect other people to do the same to you, and when they don't, you'll get angry and resentful, exactly the kinds of emotions the franchise does _not_ want associated with their drive-through.

The key to the pay it forward phenomenon is the _displaced reciprocity_. If you expect something in return, you've missed the point.

The best way to turn money into happiness, once you reach a certain threshold of standard of living, is to _spend it on other people_. If you're a corporation, on the other hand, money is the end, not the means, and using psychological tricks such as I have outlined here will no doubt make a difference on the bottom line.


Capitalizing on Kindness: A Lucrative Proposal For Drive-Throughs


<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-24-child-dental-fillings/7262108766_7a7384c9c5_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image post-thumb" title="Nora's New Filling">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-24-child-dental-fillings/7262108766_ce64c64f0d_t.jpg" alt="Nora's New Filling"/>
</a>

There are few things that makes you feel quite as terrible as a parent as seemingly allowing a part of your child's hygiene to deteriorate to the point of actually causing pain. We have known for some time that Nora has had some cavities in her molars, but it wasn't until she started complaining about tooth pain that we sought out the local pediatric dentist for an appointment. Nora went to her first inspection and was very good, opening her mouth, [like a hippo](http://www.flickr.com/photos/erikrasmussen/6824457320), for the dentist. The dentist told us that she has cavities that require fillings in all four corners of her mouth, but that her left lower molars are particularly rotten, requiring some drilling, killing the nerve, and then a cap to replace the missing bit of tooth.  Her first appointment, for the worst corner of her mouth, was this morning. Nora was so pleased with her behavior at the initial checkup that she was actually looking forward to going to the dentist. We got there a little early and had to wait for a bit in the waiting room, which was full of toys. When it was time to go in, I asked if Nora thought she could go in alone, as the dentist recommended, and she conveyed that she was very much against that idea. I went in with her and laid her down on the dentist chair/table thing, and they proceeded to put a blanket over her and then some netting to hold her down. It looked like enough restraints to hold Hannibal Lecter.

It's a bit of an understatement to say that Nora, who can't stand to ride in the car for five minutes because she can't stand being strapped in and immobilized for that long, was somewhat displeased. I held her hand for a bit, but the dentist wanted to tie her down so much that even her hands weren't free. The dentist, a pleasant enough Mexican woman, told me to stand on the other side of her if I was going to be there at all. I did, but Nora kept begging me with her eyes and words to let her out of the constraints that eventually I had to leave, because there was no way I could convince her that staying put was a good thing.

So I sat in the waiting room listening to her scream for Poppy, which she later, adapting to the Mexican dialect of the dentist, converted to _papá_. Frankly I'm surprised she didn't finish the 40 minutes of torture dental care completely hoarse, because she screamed the entire time. Several times I had to get up from my seat in the waiting room and go to the bathroom to wipe tears from my eyes and blow my nose. It took all my willpower to not rush into the dental examination room and fling the dentist against the wall and rescue my poor baby.

If you can stand it, here's an audio recording I made from outside the examination room.

<iframe width="505" height="314" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/kjaaZgdws80" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

When she was released, she came and hugged me more tightly than she ever has, clinging to me for a solid ten minutes while I spoke to the dentist, made her next appointment, and got the bill. The dentist recommended that we go buy an ice cream and then take some generic pain meds. I _think_ she was referring to her patient and not to me. We bought some ice cream and went home to medicate, Nora with some children's tylenol, and I with a glass or three of Rioja. It took Nora no time at all to revert to a happy little tot, while I was still traumatized by what I had witnessed. Ever since, I have been praising Nora for her good behavior and bravery at the dentist, and I let her watch several episodes of _Dora The Explorer_, her current reward activity of choice.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-24-child-dental-fillings/7262108766_7a7384c9c5_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora's New Filling">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-24-child-dental-fillings/7262108766_ce64c64f0d.jpg" alt="Nora's New Filling"/>
</a>

Ignore the white foam, as this was just after a toothbrushing. Note the black hole on the other side of her mouth and the horrible twisted nature of her bottom front teeth. The dentist said that Nora has particularly weak teeth.

Her local anesthesia has worn off already and she seems none the worse for her morning of dentistry. In the long run, until she reads this blog entry, she might not remember this event at all. All the better for her.

Even after all the emotional strife of today, I just want to say how thankful I am that I live in the first world and not only have access to top notch emergency dentistry when my child needs it, but that I have enough money in the bank so that I can afford it at a moment's notice. What a privilege.


Child Dental Fillings


<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228997720_6c78e0db4f_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image post-thumb" title="Nora and the Red Car">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228997720_8857565d71_t.jpg" alt="Nora and the Red Car"/>
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On Saturday we went to a birthday party at a friend's house. Remember that, in Spain, [it's the birthday boy](/2010/10/11/who-buys-your-birthday-lunch/) that hosts the party and/or buys the drinks. Nora was quite well behaved, although when the group of fifteen or so friends got too excited, laughing loudly, she cowered from the noise. Several of the men at the party did a "BOO!" trick to surprise Nora, which Nora absolutely despised, running terrified in the opposite direction. Since the host was one of the guilty booers, he gave her a model car to play with. She and I played with it for quite a bit, away from the other guests. Knowing that my iPhone's camera was particularly good at short range close-ups, I took some photos of the gorgeous car before Nora dropped it and broke off a piece.  Oops. The piece fell down between the boards in their porch, too. That's what you get for giving an object to a three year old. The owners assured us that it was a model assembled by one of their sons long ago (oh, jeez!) but that it really meant nothing to the family (oh, whew!) so it was of no concern.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228972690_fe2c1a0a3c_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora and the Red Car">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228972690_8efd398259.jpg" alt="Nora and the Red Car"/>
</a>

The doors opened upwards, like a Dolorean.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228976102_7a5e2b12cf_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora and the Red Car">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228976102_82659b8693.jpg" alt="Nora and the Red Car"/>
</a>

The vehicle really was gorgeous. When we were choosing virtual seats, Nora was initially confused that it didn't have any backseats, where she normally sits in our car.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228978872_924db8687a_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora and the Red Car">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228978872_dcb6705fdf.jpg" alt="Nora and the Red Car"/>
</a>

"Roll it to me, Poppy! Fast!"

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228997720_6c78e0db4f_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora and the Red Car">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228997720_8857565d71.jpg" alt="Nora and the Red Car"/>
</a>

I'm sure some car savvy reader can tell me the model of Mercedes?

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228981932_b4646678c0_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora and the Red Car">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228981932_dc62172603.jpg" alt="Nora and the Red Car"/>
</a>

Every time we rolled it across the table to each other it felt a little bit like that famous scene from _Thelma & Louise_.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228993374_567b0ef831_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora and the Red Car">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228993374_0bfc1f090d.jpg" alt="Nora and the Red Car"/>
</a>

Just what every car doesn't need: a giant toddler.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228990356_d9c5d3e205_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora and the Red Car">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-nora-and-the-red-mercedes/7228990356_7425ab84be.jpg" alt="Nora and the Red Car"/>
</a>

We had a great time with the vehicle.


Nora and the Red Mercedes


<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7208401532_2949be99de_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image post-thumb" title="Fashionable">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7208401532_afc9e94f93_t.jpg" alt="Fashionable"/>
</a>

The big news this month is that Nora got one of the 21 spots in the three-year-olds program at the local school that we were hoping she would get into. When I say local, I mean that I can take ten paces out of my apartment building and touch the school. Needless to say, this will save all kinds of time and headaches that would normally be the result of having to drive her to and from a school every day. Of course it'll be a few years until she's old enough to walk there (i.e. cross one street) on her own, but we might have the zip-line installed from our sixth story apartment window before then.  She's finally getting a grasp on the colors, demonstrating that she can distinguish wavelengths of light and categorize things that share the property of color. She likes to inquire about what color various items are. The other day, however, she stumped me with this one: "Poppy, what color is the mirror?" Whoa…

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7241698634_488a5c4d0a_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Nora Sleeping">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7241698634_e71b466593_m.jpg" alt="Nora Sleeping"/>
</a>

I once [not-so-famously declared](/2009/09/06/monkey-alarm/) that "The monkey alarm doesn't have a snooze button." I was referring to there being no way to delay having to get up in the middle of the night to deal with a screaming baby. That is still the case, somewhat, as I have to get up on average about 1.5 times per night to spin Nora back around so she's sleeping the proper direction in her bed or calm her after a nightmare or find her teddy bear which has been brushed off onto the floor. When it comes to getting up in the morning, however, I have devised a bit of a snooze button. Normally she will get up and open the door to the master bedroom where I am sleeping – her mother having left for work hours before – and say whatever is on her mind. It's rarely "Good morning!" and is usually "Where is Mommy?" I greet her and give her two tasks, putting on her slippers (about 10% of the time she's already done that before entering) and go take of her diaper, put it in the trash, and then empty the rest of her bladder contents into the toilet. This can take up to four or five minutes to do if she gets distracted doing other things, and I can lie back down and wake up more slowly.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7171095102_e8310ca251_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="My favorite blonds">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7171095102_643946bd1f_m.jpg" alt="My favorite blonds"/>
</a>

Sometimes I become so impressed by Nora's ability to reason through a problem or situation that I start attributing more intelligence to her than she really has. For example, she's quite good at thinking through a dependency tree such as "What do we need to do to get ready to go to daycare?" She can list putting toys away, brushing her teeth, putting on her coat, and turning off the lights. But she, like most normal three-year-olds, does not yet have a well developed [Theory of Mind](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_mind), an understanding that other people have feelings and beliefs and intentions just like she does.

One day last week she was in a pouty mood when we took our daily trip to the grocery store. In the store, she refused to say _buenos dí­as_ to anybody. On the walk home, and later at home, our discussion about her behavior went like this:

> Erik: Nora, you have to say _buenos dí­as_ to people. Nora: Why? Erik: Because people like that and then they like you and they are nice to you and might even give you things. Nora: Okay. Erik: So why do we say _buenos dí­as_ to people? Nora: I don't know. Erik: I just told you. Would you like me to tell you again? Nora: Yes. Erik: We say _buenos dí­as_ to people because that's the nice thing to do and they like it, which, in turn, makes them want to be nice to us. Do you understand? Nora: Yes. Erik: Okay, so why do we say _buenos dí­as_ to people? Nora: I don't know.
> 
> …repeat thirty times…
> 
> Erik: I'm going to tell you why, and then I'm going to ask you why, and all you have to do is say what I just said, okay? Nora: Okay. Erik: Because people like it and want to be nice to us. Okay, why? Nora: People like it and are nice to us. Erik: YES! Good girl! Nora: \[wiping a tear\] Can I have a hug now?

Perhaps that was a bit cruel, but it was interesting to see the limits of her comprehension. Every day since, she has said _buenos dí­as_ to our friends at the supermarket without fail.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7241673850_f36552e212_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Eating Chocolate with Mommy">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7241673850_9446695246.jpg" alt="Eating Chocolate with Mommy"/>
</a>

The only thing better than a chocolate bonbon is eating one with Mommy.

One of Nora's new favorite games is to take some object, like a ball or a bracelet, and hide it somewhere on her person, usually underneath her, if she's sitting, or behind her back or up her sleeve, and then ask "Where is \[the object\]??" What she wants is for her mark the other player to place great importance on finding said object and search around for it. Sometimes she will suggest that the search be moved to another room in the house. After the object can't be found, she whips it out and proclaims, "I found it! I found it!" I normally only have the stamina for about four or five rounds of this before losing interest. The key to stopping the game, I've discovered, is give no reaction whatsoever to her miraculous discovery. If you seem surprised by her reveal, even if you have refused to search, the game iterates again.

The state of the offspring is strong!

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7208401532_2949be99de_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Fashionable">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-21-state-of-the-offspring-address-may-2012/7208401532_afc9e94f93_z.jpg" alt="Fashionable"/>
</a>


State of the Offspring Address - May 2012


<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206294232_e72131067b_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image post-thumb" title="San Juan Church and Sheep - Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206294232_941f9c2cf2_t.jpg" alt="San Juan Church and Sheep - Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

After surviving the more or less nonstop rain for all of April, we are starting to see some sun again in May, however we are suffering from some icy northeasterly (I love words that are [their own opposites](http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/northeasterly)) gusts that will chill you to the bone if you're not wearing a good sweater, the same sweater that will make you unbearably hot the moment the wind stops. As a result, it's really not comfortable to be outside, no matter what you are wearing. On Sunday, however, we braved the elements to take a walk up to _Colindres de Arriba_, an older part of town, which I've [mentioned](/2007/09/28/colindres-de-arriba/) [before](/2009/07/30/another-walk-to-colindres-de-arriba/). I love being a short fifteen minute walk away from the green ovine-speckled countryside. Here are some photos from our walk.  <a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206222404_7c9420deb9_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206222404_b4d0930406.jpg" alt="Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

The walk up there takes us under the motorway that connects us very conveniently to Santander to the west and Bilbao to the east. I liked how the arrow was pointing right at the Laredo skyline.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206225468_ff3a8cdd93_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Cows in Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206225468_e94c3b0bcc.jpg" alt="Cows in Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

Springtime has brought us some adorable little calves. These calves seemed happier than mine after walking up the hill to get there.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206239506_2c1ab57313_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Colindres Countryside">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206239506_8ed99671e3.jpg" alt="Colindres Countryside"/>
</a>

The lush green mountainside.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206241956_5c9a189f19_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="San Juan Church">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206241956_264a776329.jpg" alt="San Juan Church"/>
</a>

Each of the thirty or so times I've walked up to _Colindres de Arriba_, I have been unable to avoid taking this photograph of the medieval church with the [_Pico Candiano_](/2007/06/10/return-to-pico-candiano/) behind it.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206253964_eca6a1c336_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206253964_577bce1942.jpg" alt="Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

The coats of arms on the houses are those of the families that have owned the land for centuries.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206271268_bde7b2844a_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="San Juan Church - Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206271268_004449b6d9_z.jpg" alt="San Juan Church - Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

We finally made it up to the church. Nora walked the whole way, but requested the stroller on the way back.

Just then, we heard some bells and saw a shepherd walking up the cobblestone path with about fifty sheep behind him.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206274960_760f0b2b44_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Sheep - Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206274960_949dd15d9f.jpg" alt="Sheep - Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206277972_cb959f0e42_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Sheep - Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206277972_35c5dcbb2e.jpg" alt="Sheep - Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

Can you count them without dozing off?

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206281112_1edb55a59d_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Sheep - Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206281112_ce5cae6b1d.jpg" alt="Sheep - Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

The sheep were headed down to a relatively new park to graze. We went down after them and were impressed by the seemingly effortless control the shepherd, with his dog, had over controlling where their captives went.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206291424_dabdd69572_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Sheep in Colindres">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206291424_d8137b3bd8.jpg" alt="Sheep in Colindres"/>
</a>

I took advantage of this foreground subject to capture the view of [this old haunted-looking mansion](http://www.flickr.com/photos/erikrasmussen/5007931505/) we can see from our house.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206294232_e72131067b_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="San Juan Church and Sheep - Colindres de Arriba">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206294232_941f9c2cf2.jpg" alt="San Juan Church and Sheep - Colindres de Arriba"/>
</a>

Sheeple and steeple.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206296204_642ec928c0_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Pico de las Nieves">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206296204_964b4f849f.jpg" alt="Pico de las Nieves"/>
</a>

The visibility was great, and we could clearly make out the hermitage on the [_Pico de las Nieves_](/2008/04/15/el-pico-de-las-nieves/).

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206299294_ee36140194_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Marga and Nora">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206299294_eb9e3b84c8_z.jpg" alt="Marga and Nora"/>
</a>

My walking companions.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206309154_137ca08687_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Marga and Nora">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206309154_20b54f2a00.jpg" alt="Marga and Nora"/>
</a>

A maternal kiss.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206320996_068be04261_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Marga and Nora on Seesaw">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-16-exploring-the-countryside/7206320996_13c7a46977.jpg" alt="Marga and Nora on Seesaw"/>
</a>

On the way home, we stopped at a park to see and saw for a bit. Then we went home and fried up some fresh anchovies for dinner.

We had a lovely day, and I hope you enjoyed these photos.


Exploring The Countryside


<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-10-colors-and-schools/7170998526_01e5b5dcbf_o_d.png" target="_blank" class="flickr-image post-thumb" title="Colors and Schools (thumbnail)">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-10-colors-and-schools/7170998526_59748c93a9_t.jpg" alt="Colors and Schools (thumbnail)"/>
</a>

 by erikrasmussen, on Flickr")Nora's language ability has veered mildly towards Spanish lately. For a while now she would only converse with me in English, but now she will sometimes switch to Spanish if she doesn't know how to say the phrase in English, or if she just forgets. I dutifully respond, "You mean, 'blah blah blah'?" translating what she just said into English, and she repeats it and goes acquiring new English words like this.  <a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-10-colors-and-schools/7171033950_ecbfb7d88f_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Big Mouth">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-10-colors-and-schools/7171033950_eca6fc59e1_m.jpg" alt="Big Mouth"/>
</a>

Her memory continues to astound me. Yesterday she was taking only very small bites of her lunch, and I told her to take bigger bites. She claimed that the bigger bites wouldn't _entrar_ in her mouth, and I explained that yes, actually, they would. She opened her mouth wide as if to test my claim, and I took a photo to show her. After she closed it, she said, "I can open my mouth big like the hippos!" Surprised that she had made the connection, I inquired where she had seen hippos, and she responded matter-of-factly that she had seen hippos in _Cabárceno_. That was [two months ago](/2012/03/11/visiting-cabarceno-zoo-cantabria-tourism/).

She also is full of stories that a more mature mind might not discuss, like today when we walked by a bar, she told me about one time when she and her aunt were stuck in the bar's bathroom and they couldn't open the door.

Three year olds should definitely be treated as social moles spying on their own families. We can no longer freely criticize people that we know from the privacy of our own homes because she's capable of parroting anything to anybody.

I recorded the following interview with her today to capture the state of her language skills. She will often go off onto tangents about things she experienced months ago. Her language for temporally positioning events is still pretty rudimentary, with "yesterday" meaning any time in the past.

The video starts with the end of her sentence, "What are you gonna do?" when she saw me setting up the camera.

<iframe width="505" height="314" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/n4iehR1gx2M" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

We will know if she got in to the school near our house at the end of next week. After we finished filming, I gave her the camera to "take me a picture".

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-10-colors-and-schools/7171055020_78e96cd6ed_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Photo of Poppy">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-10-colors-and-schools/7171055020_027fae5fdc.jpg" alt="Photo of Poppy"/>
</a>


Colors and Schools


[![balance scale](https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-09-a-just-world/5751301741_aa8463e472_t.jpg)](http://www.flickr.com/photos/61056899@N06/5751301741/ "balance scale by winnifredxoxo, on Flickr")For a long time, I have been trying to figure out how conservatism and, in particular, the Republican Party in the United States, have married politically conservative and socially conservative ideals, and thereby successfully courted the vast number of religious voters. How does a biblical position like being against gay marriage and abortion correspond with reducing healthcare and welfare spending? And on the liberal side of the coin, how does being in favor of allowing gay marriage and abortion rights correlate with being in favor of universal healthcare and welfare?  Jesus was a political liberal, very much in favor of helping the poor and downtrodden among us. Meek, earth, camel, needle, etc. Asking _why_ Jesus was politically liberal is akin to asking why the Earth is the right distance from the sun to support life. If it wasn't true, then [you wouldn't be asking the question](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anthropic_principle). If Jesus hadn't been in favor of the poor, then his teachings would never have spread, and we wouldn't be discussing an iron age cult.

So why wouldn't Christians vote in favor of policies that aid the poor?

A few years ago, I learned of a cognitive bias known as the [Just World Hypothesis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Just-world_hypothesis), and the more I learn about it, the more it explains the odd partnership of Christians and the rich. The Just World Hypothesis can be summarized with those common trite remarks:

- What goes around comes around.
- You reap what you sow.
- He got what was coming to him.

It's the fallacy that good things happen to good people and bad things happen to bad people. It's the ideal result of the Golden Rule that we all naively wish was always the case.

How does this hypothesis help to solve our conservatism conundrum? Well, logically it follows directly that, _if_ you grant that there is an omnipotent deity that is looking out for our best interests, then everyone deserves exactly what they get. The poor are poor for a reason; the rich are rich for a reason; you deserve that membership to the country club, and that other guy deserves to have cancer. [Pat Robertson](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pat_robertson) gets press every so often for proclaiming that Haiti or Japan deserves its natural disaster for not obeying the Lord, and he gets written off by moderate Christians as a whacky radical, but to me, the [Problem of Evil](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Problem_of_evil) really is one of the strongest nails in the coffin of theism. **If God is omnipotent and just, then we all deserve what we get.**

Once you've bought into the Just World worldview, the conservative "don't tax the rich" and "don't help the poor" is an obvious corollary. _Even if you're poor._ Another thing that has [vexed me for years](/2006/06/19/voting/) is how the poor could vote Republican, when it's obviously not in their best economic interests. If you think that you deserve to be poor, for a reason not comprehendible by a mere mortal such as yourself, and the wealthy 1% deserve what they enjoy, then it makes perfect – yet twisted and fallacious – sense to vote for the party who will institute conservative policies.

I want to stress that the arrow of causation is not clearly defined here. I suspect that both the religious and political viewpoints stem from an underlying tendency to prefer the idea that the universe is ordered fairly. Personally, understanding this makes me feel better about people that vote conservative. They aren't total jerks lacking any sense of empathy; they're just reasoning sensibly from a different, albeit fallacious, starting premise.

The irony is that believing the the world is just only makes it less so.


A Just World: The link between conservative politics and religion


<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7001586562_c516edc0d2_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image post-thumb" title="Bride and Groom">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7001586562_d5f8f0a124_t.jpg" alt="Bride and Groom"/>
</a>

It was December 15, 2001, when I first got on a plane with my suitcase and guitar and the plan of no longer being a resident of my native land. I flew into Birmingham, England, and my future wife picked me up and drove – amazingly, to me – effortlessly on the wrong side of the road to the flat she was renting with a friend and coworker, a tall Basque girl by the name of Aitziber (pronounced eye-CHEE-bear). The three of us would be flatmates for nine or ten months. Aitziber moved back to Spain a couple years before we did, and we fell out of contact as happens in life. Aitziber, however, is one of those thoughtful people that, without fail, calls on my wife's birthday to chat and describe what happened since they talked the previous year. We were pleased to be invited to her wedding this past weekend, especially since it was so close, in Getxo, a suburb of Bilbao.  <a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7001583856_760c0435dd_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Iglesia de la Santí­sima Trinidad, Getxo">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7001583856_65ca24d0ac.jpg" alt="Iglesia de la Santí­sima Trinidad, Getxo"/>
</a>

It took us a while to find the church because Google tried to send us down several pedestrian cobblestone streets that were either too narrow to drive down or had stairs. The church was lovely, and the mass was a standard hour-long Spanish wedding. They had brought the priest with them from where they live in Murcia.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7147672497_1fcc06795c_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Iglesia de la Santí­sima Trinidad, Getxo">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7147672497_42169e63a1.jpg" alt="Iglesia de la Santí­sima Trinidad, Getxo"/>
</a>

I could've taken a hundred photos of the church's facade if I'd had my DSLR and it weren't raining. It was gorgeous.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7147677243_e337a471fe_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Friends">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7147677243_96c7024e2c.jpg" alt="Friends"/>
</a>

The best part of the wedding was getting to chat and drink with some of the friends I made in my four years in England. No one seems to have aged much in the six or seven years since I've seen them, which is good.

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7001590942_ca2f7a517c_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Friends">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7001590942_828e5d4278.jpg" alt="Friends"/>
</a>

And then there's this guy, Carlos, who looked very vaguely familiar, who we eventually figured out that we knew from one night out with friends back in August 2001, which happens to be the only such night [I've blogged photos of](/2011/04/09/oxford-and-walsall-august-2001/).

<a href="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7001586562_c516edc0d2_o_d.jpg" target="_blank" class="flickr-image" title="Bride and Groom">
  <img src="https://d1js6qm6cshi0v.cloudfront.net/oldblog/2012-05-06-aitzibers-wedding/7001586562_d5f8f0a124.jpg" alt="Bride and Groom"/>
</a>

Here we are with the bride and groom. I wish them all the best.


8 posts from May, 2012