What the IT department is REALLY doing with your laptop

Have you ever left your computer in the shop or with your employer's IT department for them to fix? You can't help but wonder, why are they taking so long?

I've worked for several IT departments, and I've worked with some really nice, competent people, and some really cranky, incompetent people. Being a network administrator is a huge power rush. When I was 16, I was interning at a local government institution and had full administrator privileges across the entire network with hundreds of users. I could view people's screens or delete their files on a whim if I so chose. Luckily I was a benevolent deity.

After all my years of experience, I now present the secret that the IT department doesn't want you to know: what they are really doing with your laptop.

She got this "computer" for Christmas. It speaks English, Spanish and Basque, and she's actually learned, or at least repeated successfully to my ear, quite a few Basque words.

At the end, she exhibits one of her current English speech problems, saying "Do you are done, now?" Instead of saying "Are you…", she usually says, "Do you are…"